Got my diaper bag

I have been on a hunt for a diaper bag for some time now. As of tonight, the hunt is over. You can see the bag I picked here.

I tried to pick one that would be large enough for cloth diaper supplies but not huge. I found another one that I really liked, but it was smaller and was twice the price. I couldn't justify it, although it sure was cute.

I think I'm almost ready for the baby. I guess I should be, considering I have anywhere from 10 days to 17 days before he'll be out of my belly and in my arms.

Dinosaur pajamas

I love these. They're too adorable on. They look like old man pajamas, but are covered with dinosaurs. Enzo is wearing them now. Earlier, he allowed me to photograph him wearing the pajamas.

This is very appropriate

I found this article,USATODAY.com - Battle lines drawn over C-sections, and it is very applicable to my situation.

Enzo was born via c-section back in 2002. The reasons for the c-section: primarily cephalopelvic disproportion ( a fancy way to say that his head was bigger than my pelvic opening), and a failure to progress, probably due to the disproportion. I never dilated more than 4 cm.

My doctor gave me the choice: VBAC or repeat scheduled c-section.

I chose the repeat c-section after a lot of consultation with both my doctor as well as Doctor Google. The reasons for my decision were partly personal, partly medical. My pelvis isn't any bigger now than it was 3 years ago. Enzo wasn't an abnormally large baby. I don't think he even qualified as large. He weighed 7 pounds, 6 ounces. This baby seems larger (or at least my belly is bigger). I've had some bad luck with pregnancy complications (none life-threatening up to this point, knock on wood) and given my past track record, I would be the one in the statistical minority who has major VBAC complications, such as uterine rupture. So since the reason for the c-section the first time is something that's still present, I'd rather not risk the possibility of labour-related complications, as well as the selfish part of me that doesn't want to go through another 24+ hour labour only to end up in the operating room again. Plus, there's the issue of Enzo this time. While I'm having this baby, his caregiver is going to be my sister. She lives over 30 minutes away. I don't want to have to drag Enzo up to the hospital in the middle of the night to wait for her to come get him. So since I know when we're going to have the baby, she's going to take him the night before and then bring him to the hospital after the baby's here and we're all settled.

I know my decision might not be the right one for everyone. But it's the right one for me. And that's all that matters. Because after all, we all know that it's all about me, right?

This made me cry

This is from Chez Miscarriage, home of getupgrrl. Her son was recently born and she's posted the birth story. This stuff is really getting to me and I'm sure it's the hormones. But grrl's story is a little different. She had infertility problems because of some uterine issues and found a wonderful woman to be her surrogate mother. Grrl doesn't leave her posts up for long and doesn't maintain an archive because of someone stealing her work. I do hope you'll stop by to read this post that has made me cry every time I've read it before it's gone.

It's things like:

I remember the hospital administrator who attached two matching identity bracelets to Sarah's and my wrists - One for the egg, she said smartly as she clicked my bracelet closed, and one for the uterus.

and

I remember how our hospital room began to fill up as the day went on and our story got passed around the floor. I remember the nurses who stayed past their shifts, the shy medical students, the residents who kept popping in and giving us the thumbs-up sign. I remember the sense that they were all rooting for us, that they had seen our two families (all of whom were pacing the hall, fielding phone calls, and bringing one another food) and understood what we were trying to do.

and

When it was morning, before our families returned with breakfast and raucous demands to hold the baby, I said to her, I know you think that you created a life yesterday, but really, you created two. You have renewed me.

She reached for my hand across the bassinet and said, I knew it would happen like this. I knew it would feel like this. I knew he would be like this.

I knew I would love him this much.

that get me every time.