Some suggestions...

I offer some suggestions to make your next call to an 800 number more enjoyable for everyone involved:

• The person answering the phone doesn't want to know how long you were on hold before they answered. Chances are, they already know, since they can see how many calls are holding. And if you lie, they'll know. So don't try to make them feel bad that you've been on hold for 45 minutes so you'll get what you want when that person knows that there have been no calls waiting for the last 30 minutes and that you got right through.
• Have any pertinent information handy. Account number, phone number, case number, whatever it is.
• If you're upset about something, behave as calmly and as rationally as possible. Would you want to listen to someone yelling profanities?
• Get the name of the person you're speaking with, and their department and extension number or representative id if possible. This may come in handy down the line, especially if you're making changes to something on an account or requesting information. Sometimes things aren't done as promised, or aren't done...period. It may or may not be intentional, but the more information you have about the person who was supposed to do it, the easier it will be to fix.
• Don't complain about hold music to the person who answers the phone. They're powerless to change it. And as someone who's listened to a lot of hold music at several different companies, I can tell you this: it all sucks, some more than others.
• Finally, keep in mind that the voice on the other end of the line belongs to a human, someone not unlike yourself. Treat them as you'd like to be treated and things are more likely to turn out the way you'd like.